Friendship Is A Really Beautiful Thing
Friendship is a really beautiful thing. I think that it is the most genuine of relationships. Friends are the ones that we choose purely because we like them and we connect with them and CHOOSE them. I value family more highly than almost anything and some of my family members are some of my very best friends, but being family doesn’t guarantee friendship, that part is still a choice. Romantic relationships are also very cool, but again, I think at the core of all the best ones is friendship. Romance doesn’t get you very far without it.
When I was in kindergarten I remember a girl named Felicia asking me one day if I wanted to be best friends. “Yep!” was my quick reply. At the time it was that simple. If you wanted to be besties you just had to ask. But now I am feeling the complexity and the beauty of choosing other humans to be a part of your life.
We celebrated the life of my dear friend Eric today and I heard his Dad say something that made a lot of sense: there are many concentric circles that surround us as people and there are friends at each level. Not everyone makes it to the innermost circle, but each layer is valued and important. What strikes me as beautiful is how over time, with trust, shared experiences, shared values, shared laughter, shared crying and hopefully a good amount of shared silliness, certain people get closer and closer into those circles. At the same time, other people sort of drift in and out and still others stay closer to the fringes. I used to think that I could and should be friends with anyone and everyone. I have learned that while I can be friendly with everyone I want to, it’s ok for friends to be in different circles and on different levels. It does not lessen the value of that friendship or that person.
So today I am feeling especially grateful to all my wacky, weird, brilliant, adventurous, supportive, full-moon chasing, coffee-drinking, creative, loving friends.
And thank you, Eric, for being all that and more, and for sharing the beauty of friendship with me.
Originally posted April 10, 2016.